motivation, wellbeing

Loosing & Living

It’s that time of year when you spend time with family and friends who are here and remember the ones who are no longer here…

I love Christmas, ever since I was a little kid. I use to love the thought of Father Christmas coming to leave my presents for being a good girl, not just because I was an only child a got a fair few pressies, I loved decorating the  tree (I still do! 1st December every year), the classic tunes were always something to look forward to and watching Christmas films (Disney at Christmas was one of my favourites). But now I am older and I still love Christmas, for a long time I’ve had people to miss at Christmas, especially my Mum. 

You’d think after 17 years it’d get easier to have a Christmas and to be honest it does but there’s always that person missing and it does leave a whole in the celebrations. A way that I still keep my Mum involved is that I do visit the church yard either a few days before Christmas or on Christmas morning. As myself and my dad have got older we tend to go a few days before Christmas because our Christmas seems to get busier with each passing year. 

But do you feel bad about remembering people who you’ve lost around Christmas because its meant to be a happy occasion? Why does the memory need to be sad!? I really love looking at my photo album a few days before Christmas and look at all the old Christmas pictures of me, my mum and my dad. Some of these pictures go back to my first family Christmas at my nan and grandads and at my auntie and uncle’s. 

Sometimes when the bereavement is fresh it can be harder to remember and enjoy those fun and happy memories but as years go by it gets much easier. Even if you enjoy a Christmas film which you use to watch together or listen to their favourite Christmas song whilst putting up the tree. It’s important to remember those happy memories and not to let sad ones over take them. If you prefer then sometimes a festive walk with your memories can be the best way to enjoy them, then you can sit down outside and really connect to the feelings of that memory.

Remember, the memory of people we’ve lost is a great way for us to celebrate Christmas. It keeps us connected to them both in the past and the present.

Much love x